Panic!

This is a computer-generated transcription that has been included to make the homily searchable.  It has not been verified by the author.

Sometimes things can be going well in our life, going smoothly, things are going in the right direction, like the wind is with us, it’s smooth sailing. But sometimes we can be in a situation, like the gospel today, feel like we’re in a little boat, in a dark night, tossed about by winds and waves that we can’t control. Sometimes, with our little Mission of Divine Mercy, that’s the way it feels to me, like a little boat riding low in the water being tossed about. And, like the apostles, we can feel, in those situations, frightened. And this boat also is often seen as like an image, of Peter’s boat, as an image of the Church. And I think in many ways that describes the situation of the Church today, like a boat in a dark night, being tossed about in the storm. So I wanted to reflect on this Gospel, today with the help of a person many of you are familiar with, the mystic, Maria Valtorta. And who has a meditation on this passage, first of all, on what happened, and then with the meaning of it. So remember, again, this is Jesus, it’s after the multiplication of the loaves and fishes. Jesus has dismissed the crowds. He sent the apostles to the other side, as He’s gone up on the mountain to pray at night. And that’s the situation when the storm picks up. So she writes, “Jesus is aroused from his meditation, he stands up and looks at the lake. He scans it in the light of the remaining stars of the poor, sickly dawn, and sees the boat of Peter, which is striving hard to reach the opposite shore, but cannot make it. Jesus pulls His mantle tight around himself, and runs down a very steep path, which leads straight to the lake. He ran so fast that he seems to be flying. When he reaches the shore, lashed by the waves, he continues to walk fast, as if he were treading not on a restless tossing liquid element, but on the smoothest, most solid pavement on the earth. He now becomes light. All the faint light that still comes in the few dying stars, and the stormy dawn, seem to converge on him, gathering like phosphorescence around him. He flies over the waves, the foamy crest in the dark folds between the waves with his arms stretched forward. The Apostle see him and other a cry of fear, which the wind carries towards Jesus. Be not afraid it is I Jesus voice although the wind is against him, is carried clearly over the lake. Is it really you master, asked Peter? If it is you tell me to come and meet you walking on the water like you.” So notice that this is Peter’s initiative. Peter is the one who has proposed this. Peter is often very human and impulsive like us. “Jesus smiles. Come, He says it’s simply as if they indicate that the walk on the water were the most natural thing in the world. And Peter wearing only a short sleeveless tunic, jumps overboard and walks towards Jesus. But when he is about 50 yards from the boat, and as many from Jesus, he is seized with fear. So far his love impetus supported him. Now his human nature overwhelms him, and he fears for his own skin. Like when he was on slippery ground, or better still on quicksand, he begins to stagger, to grope, to sink. And the more he gropes and fears, the more he sinks. Jesus has stopped and looks at him. He is serious and waits, but he does not stretch out, even one hand. His arms are folded, and He does not take one step or other one word. Peter is sinking, his shins, knees disappear. The water reaches up to his waist. Terror is on his face. Terror paralyzes  his thoughts as well. He is nothing but flesh, afraid of sinking. He does not even think of swimming. Nothing, he is panicked, overwhelmed by fear. At last he decides to look at Jesus. As soon as he looks at him, his mind begins to reason and see where salvation is. Master, my Lord save me. Jesus opens His arms. And as if you are carried by the wind, and by the waves, He rushes towards the apostle, that holds out His hand saying, Oh, what a man of little faith. Why did you doubt me? Why did you want to do it by yourself?” That’s a key phrase to do it by yourself. “Peter who had crashed convulsively at Jesus hand, does not reply. He looks at Him only to ascertain whether He is angry with a mixture of remaining fear and rising repentance. But Jesus smiles at him and holds him firmly by the wrist until they reach the boat and step overboard into it. Then Jesus orders, go to the shore, he has soaked through. And he smiles looking at the mortified disciples. The waves smooth down, making it easy to land.” So that’s recounting vividly the experience. And then as a teaching. Jesus says, “many times, I do not even wait to be called when I see my children in danger. And many times, I rushed to help a son, who was ungrateful to me. You are asleep, or you are seized by the worries and anxieties of life. I watch and I pray for you. I am the angel of all men, and I looked after you. And nothing grieves me more than the impossibility of interference, because you refused my intervention. Or because you prefer to act on your own. Or worse still, you asked the evil one to help you. Like a father, he hears his son say to him, I do not love you, I do not want you, get out of my house. I am mortified and I suffer more than I did because of my physical wounds. But if you do not tell me go away, but you’re absent minded only because of the worries of life. Then I am the eternal watchman, ready to come, even before he is called. In if I wait for you to say a word, as I sometimes do, it is only to hear you call me. How pleasant how sweet it is to hear men call me, to hear that they remember that I am the Savior. I will not mention the infinite joy that pervades and exalts me when there is someone who loves me and calls me without being in need. He calls me because he loves me more than he loves anybody else in the world, and is filled with joy as I am, only by calling Jesus, Jesus as children call mommy, mommy. And they taste the sweetness of honey on their lips, because the simple word Mommy has in itself the taste of motherly kisses. The apostles were rowing, obeying my order to go and wait for me at Capernaum.” And then I’m skipping a passage where it talks about how Jesus was praying on the hill to give thanks to God for the miracle that had just taken place at the multiplication. “But although my blessedness was complete,” as he was praying, “because it was a blessedness of love. It did not abstract me from the needs of men. And I became aware of the danger of my children on the lake. And I left love for the sake of love. Charity must be speedy. They confuse me with a ghost. How often my poor children, you take me for a ghost for a frightening object. If you always thought of me, you would know me at once. But you have other ghosts in your heart and that makes you dizzy. But I make myself known. If you only listen to me. Why was Peter sinking after watching so far? You said it was because this human nature overwhelmed His Spirit, Peter was very much a man. Had it been the apostle John, he would not have dared immoderately, nor would he have changed his mind. Purity grants prudence, and strength.  But Peter, so again, this was Peters own impetus initiative. But Peter was man and the full meaning of the word, he was anxious to excel, to show that nobody loves the master as he did. He wanted to impose himself, and only because he was one of mine, he thought he was above the weakness of the flesh. Instead, poor Simon, his results when he was tested, were far from being sublime. But it was necessary that he might later be the one who was to perpetuate the mercy of the master, and the dawn in church.” So Peter’s thoughts became an occasion of being his own experience of mercy and occasion of sharing God’s mercy with others. “Peter is not only overwhelmed by fear for his endangered life, but as you said, he became nothing but he becomes nothing but trembling flesh, he no longer thinks he no longer looks at me, you all do the same. The more impending is the danger, the more you want to do things by yourself, as if you were able to do things. You never go away from me, or close your heart to me, or even curse me, as in the hours when you are to hope in me and call me. Peter does not curse me, but he forgets me. And I have to impose my will to call his spirit to me, so that he may look at his master and Savior,” that is that Jesus was spiritually imposing his will to draw Peter’s attention to him. “I absolve him beforehand of his sin of doubt, because I love him as this impulsive man, once he is confirmed by grace, will be able to proceed without any further perturbation or tiredness, as far as martyrdom, and he will be indefatigable in casting his mystical net, to take souls to his master. And when he invokes me, I do not walk, I fly to help him, and I hold him tight to lead him to salvation. My reproach is a mild one, because I understand the extenuating circumstances of Peter. I am the best advocate and judge there is, and there has ever been for everybody. I understand you, my poor children. And even when I say a word of reproach, my smile mitigates it. I love you. That is all. I want you to have faith. And if you do have it, I will come and take you out of danger. Oh, if the earth could say, Master, Lord save me, one cry of the whole earth would be enough. And satan and his sectarians would be immediately defeated. But you do not know how to have faith. I am multiplying the means to lead you to faith. I do my duty as the eternal savior. And even if I cannot save the world, because the world does not want to be saved, I will save from the world those who are ordered to love me as I am to be loved are no longer of the world.” So this is a good example of faith that permits God to act when our own little boat feels out of control. When the Church feels like this little boat out of control, to turn to Jesus as the times we live in these difficult times that we’re living. Come Lord Jesus. And right now, in this holy Eucharist with our Blessed Mother, the greatest example of this faith we can pray. Come Lord Jesus, Jesus, we trust in You. Amen.

KEYWORDS / PHRASES:
Matthew 14:22-33